oops!

Apparently Mitt Romney has found a new Country.

Frustration!

Politics!  The state of today's politics leaves me just frustrated.  I want to think everything will work out no matter who wins, but I really don't believe it.  I grew up in a Republican family,  but I truly am far far from the current republicans.   Against a long-standing policy of mine I will be making political commentary from time to time.  This election is so important! 

Love,
Shel

Oh, So,So, Much!

So much has happened!  First and last in importance, our internet connection sucked for months.  Starting in December our internet suffered the slows.  AT&T was called numerous times to check as it turns out everything.  There must have been six visits.  They replaced portions of the inside wiring.  The changed the wireless router/modem.  They changed TV boxes.  Some things were fixed, but the wireless continued to SUCK!
I just added a Wireless N access point and Magic things work.  Apparently their wireless router is less than....
Oh face it it is a piece of Cr*P.

There have been physical problems.  I am hope tonight and not at the Gay and Lesbian Film festival because I don't feel very well.  The biggest problem came several weeks ago.  I had an "Happening."  I thought the happening might have been a heart problem.  I even called 911 and the paramedics came.  By the time they came I was feeling much better (it didn't take long for them to arrive, either.) I have had every cardiac test short of surgical procedures.  I am apparently just fine.  I apparently had a form of heat exhaustion and dehydration. I may also be having a virus.  So I drink a lot in the heat now and I just live through the virus symptoms.  I'll take that over heart problems any day. 

Mentioning the Hartford Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, I would have been working at it if I hadn't been taking tests for the "happening."  I have missed so much this year with my father's health problems and death and now this!  I wouldn't have done things differently, but it has been quite a year.

Have a great night,
Love,  Shel

Cleaning up

It seems that I am destined to spend a great deal of time pulling the threads of my father's life and death together.  This week I moved as much of his things out of his apartment as I could find storage for.  Now our closed-in porch is storage.  I still have a great deal of work to do.  Some items need to be sold just to recover the cost of the move.  It costs an amazing amount to move his things 90 miles.  Imagine a far greater move.  How do people afford such moves? 

In any event I am still dealing with his life and not my own.  My life keeps pulling at my sleeves.  People I have worked with keep asking and I have to say "I don't know."  This is all much harder than I could have ever imagined.  The physical problems are hard, but the emotional ones are hard also.  Just before the move I stayed one last night in his apartment.  All I can say is that the ghosts of my family haunted my sleep.  My Grandfather, my Mother and now my Father all died in that house.  I grew up in that house.  A whole chapter of my family's life has come to an end. 

Thursday I make one last journey there to finish cleaning and picking up remnants.  I will leave the keys and it will be finished.  I will feel relieved but sad.

Love,
Shel

Resuming Life

I have been so involved with my father's health and welfare and eventually death that my own life has been shelved.  I now need to re enter my life.  I am not really sure where to begin, but until my father's estate is settled I have a lot still to do.  I have been sorting through his stuff and it is a difficult job.  There have been some surprises, some nice memories and some sad memories and above all some hard decisions.  What do I keep and what do I get rid of?  It is a night mare and I am the only one who can do this.  I am an only child.

The weather is crappy after a nice spell and I have gone home for a bit before going back to packing and sorting my father's things.  I think I'll be back to the task on Tuesday.

Be well.
Love,
Shel

One Month

Today it has been one month since my father died.  Monday my eldest son and I laid him to rest in Arlington National Cemetery.  He was in the Air Force for 26 years and a veteran of WWII and Korea. I am now bogged down in all his possessions and how to deal with them.  It is an amazingly painful and difficult task.  I am finding as many of my mother's things as anything and so many memories are coming back.  I guess this is what people go through, but usually there are brothers and sisters to share the tasks.  I am an only child so I have the task alone. 

People's lives don't equate to their possessions, but certainly my father's things have brought back much of his life to me.  We all come to the end of our lives at some time.  My father lived to be 100 and he was healthy most of that time and had his wits until the very end.  He was truly blessed as I have been to have him as a father.

God's Peace to you all,
Shel

A sad goodbye

So much has happened since the last Blog post!  The picture is of my father who just lost his battle to stay alive.  It was a long hard battle and he was such a great man!  I miss him.

In November he got a serious urinary tract infection which required intravenous antibiotic treatment in the Hospital.  He came home for one day and had to return with another infection called C. Difficile.  It is a very serious infection that robbed him of all his strength.  He was in a nursing home to recover until last week when I brought him home.  It was clear that he was loosing his battle and he wanted to be home.  Once home he declined rapidly and died peacefully yesterday. 

He was a man of great faith and strength.  He loved me and I loved him.  Sadness fills my heart now and the pain is indescribable.  I love you Pappy!