Thursday, December 18, 2008


I am discovering my own limits. I have long known that I have physical limits, but I kind of had some emotional high expectations of myself. I thought I had the ability to put almost anything behind me and to be charitable. I have discovered differently. I am discovering that being snubbed by a friend has really turned me off. I really think a great deal of my friends and I will often do a lot for them. But I have discovered that when one turns on me I am not so willing to be generous with myself any more. It is not what I expected of myself, but it is real.

It has been a tough week (wisdom tooth extracted Monday, in fact a tough month(Surgery on the 1st)and today was a very long day(I drove to Westerly, R.I. and back). My charity and good nature have been exhausted. I found I had to leave a social engagement early just to keep my perspective on things. I probably should have stuck it out, but I was feeling irritable. I decided I should go home. Enough said.

I have been seeing a therapist to gain some insight into myself. I am learning when to say no and when to call things to a halt. Maybe God can have infinite patience, love and forgiveness but I am not God. I have limits. I am really tired now so I am going to end.

Tomorrow's weather is supposed to be real bad. If you live in New England and plan to drive, please drive safely. Stay warm and stay dry.


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