Follow up

Just to fill in anyone who is interested, I went to the Doctor's Friday and I am doing very well. He moved my diet up to level 4, which means that I now get to eat pured foods (yes, baby food.) The link is to a web site that gives something close to my diet. It isn't the one from my Dr. The good news is that I had lost 23 pounds as of Friday. I am of course consuming very little. The average meal is 1/4 cup. The curious thing is that I really don't feel what you would call hunger. I miss eating things. It is hard to watch others consume pizza and steak and not participate, but I knew that this would be the case when I went into this. I will eventually be able to eat more conventional foods (even the steak), but I am still healing. this is the reason for the staged diet afterward. Bad things can happen if the diet isn't followed, so I comply.

I have been going through some very intense emotional swings. I am not really sure what it is all about. I am sure eating filled a void in my life. Possibly now that eating is less prominent I need to deal with that void. I have seen my ex more that I used to, just because we both visit my son and granddaughter. The visit is usually pleasant, but recently she has seemed resentful (more than usual.) My youngest son often seems to be the catalyst for her resentment. If things get worse, I will have to visit when she doesn't I guess.

Right now I am dealing with diet and attempting to be as active as possible. I am also trying to be as positive as possible (which has been difficult with the mood swings.) I try any way. One helpful thing is that the sun is shining and temperatures are coming up as are the flowers.

You have a bright day.

Love,
Shel

Quickly

I came home from the hospital yesterday. The surgery went well and I am healing. I have some small amount of soreness, but not a lot. It hurts to cough, but it was abdominal surgery. My challenge is now getting some nourishment down and staying hydrated small sips at a time. Crushing and taking pills will be a bit challenging also. I am sure I will get the hang of things.

I'm off to take a brief nap. Have a great day.

Love,
Shel

A Million Dollar Friday Five

A Million Dollar Friday Five


Singing Owl at RevGalBlogpals posses this question today:

Lingering effects of a cold have me watching more television than usual. There appears to be a resurgence of the old daytime staple--the quiz show. Except they are on during prime time, and a great many of them offer the chance of winning one million dollars.

I think it started with Regis Philbin and "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" but now we have a half dozen or so.

My husband and I started musing (after watching "Deal or No Deal") about what we could do with a million dollars. I thought I'd just bring that discussion into the Friday Five this week. It's simple. What are five things you would want to do with a million dollar deposit in your bank account?


1) Get thee behind me Satan! Five years ago my life changed drastically. Part of that change was financial. In that time I have been within $15 of total poverty and I have been deathly ill. Though money is a necessity, DON'T give me a Million! I would not deal with it wisely I am afraid.

2) The above aside I guess a Million would provide a level of security and ability to pay one's debts that I currently don't have.

3) I would like to be able to be generous and give some money to good causes.

4) I am not sure money would really improve my life all that much at the base of things. I would be able to help my children a bit and that would be good.

5) I might buy a new car. My present one is nine years old with 160,000 miles on it. The car would have to be fuel efficient and simple. The Amish may have the right idea about simple living.

What I would really like is a Million Blessings for each of you!

Love,
Shel

Ready

The date of my Lap-Band surgery is getting near. It is this Monday. I have had soo many tests. The latest was a CAT scan. I think I am not likely to know the results of that for a while unless it shows something alarming. The Echo Cardiogram showed a perfectly normal healthy heart. That is great. It looks like I am ready for this big step in my life. Eating will change for ever and I am hopeful that I will achieve a normal weight at long last. I am ready. Wish me well.

Love,
Shel

Preparations

Last week was a very difficult week. I had three days of different forms of medical tests and examinations. I have been poked and prodded and I have answered a thousand questions. It isn't that I am in any worse physical condition, it's that the doctor's want to make sure they are on top of the surgery. The last appointment was with a cardiologist who talked about risk management. I guess that the judgment is that my risk is rather low. This is good news. The only problem is that he followed that assessment with an order for an echo cardiogram. I had that Thursday. It's a rather easy test, kind of like a sonogram. I won't know any results until next week since Friday was Good Friday and I am sure little work was done that day. In the mean time I diet away at 1000 calories per day with no fat.

Next week will be I hope more stress free. The tests were not strenuous like the colonoscopy but the whole process was stressful. Oh and to add to the stress I testified before the Legislature's Judiciary committee on Wednesday. A fun week.

It is Easter Morning as I write this. I wish you new life and the peace which resurrection brings. I know a bit about resurrection and rebirth. Easter is about renewal. I hope you are renewed today and every day. God's Peace!

Love,
Shel

Actual Blog

Here's an actual Blog entry for you. As I have mentioned previously I am about to have the LAP-Band surgery for weight loss. I have been having medical tests prior to the surgery. Last week I had an endoscopy and colonoscopy. Today I had a battery of tests including blood work, EKG and a chest X-ray. I also had a workup by a Doctor and consultation with anesthesiology. Tomorrow I have a consultation with a cardiologist. Whew!

The surgery is scheduled for April 31st. Please remember me that day. So far everything has been a go for the surgery. I want to say a bit about the endoscopy and colonoscopy. The endoscopy is a proceedure to examine the upper digestive system (esophagus, stomach and upper intestine) and is about as unpleasant a procedure as you might ever want to have. Though they give some anesthesia it is not enough to knock you out. They place a tube down your throat and look around. Not fun! The colonoscopy is a procedure that wasn't required for the LAP-Band surgery, but it was due as a regular follow-up post colon cancer. I have had that procedure many times. The prep is not pleasant since you need a thorough cleaning inside. They put you our for the test itself so you are unaware of most of it. They woke me up during the very end of the proceedure so I watched it on the monitor. I was not uncomfortable. The uncomfortablness comes later! They fill your colon with air during the test and in the following days there is a great passing of wind. Ugh!

Today I started my pre-surgery diet. It is a 1000 calorie a day low fat diet. It should be easy to do. So much for the update.

You be well.

Love,
Shel

Virtual Blogging

I have been composing blog posts in my head for a while now. The problem is that not one of them has made it to the computer yet. I guess that that is a sort of virtual blogging. All I can say is that my virtual posts (all of them) were just brilliant!
Forgive me I am in a very strange state of mind. I look at myself in the mirror in absolute disgust. My whole way of eating is about to change drastically and I really feel deeply alone (while surrounded by friends).

Maybe some of the virtual will become actual soon.

Peace,
Shel