Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Malaise


I am suffering from a kind of malaise (In everyday usage, malaise tends to mean feeling vaguely unwell, not having the energy to get up and do anything, or even just being lazy.) I am not really sure what it is all about, but there are several possibilities. The biggest suspect is sudden inactivity. I have been extremely busy since February with various projects. Last week the Gay and Lesbian Film Film Festival finished. Suddenly I don't have much left to do. The reality though is that I really don't have many structured things to do. I have things that need doing, but they require me to be self motivated and organized. This takes more effort. I guess I am like a lot of people and move toward things that require less effort. There are other reasons that are suspect, but I am unwilling to talk about them here.

So what am I doing? Simple things like doing the dishes and writing this. I have watched Movies for the past two days. Today I need to break the pattern and to move beyond the malaise. I my case I think that malaise tends more toward the lazy than to the sick. Though I may actually be a kind of sick but that's not for here.

The weather is grand so I think I need to walk, after I finish the dishes I think.

Love,
Shel

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