I am sooo tired! I literally have tired myself out and practically driven myself crazy. It has been to absolutely no purpose. Whatever has been bothering me can't be changed in the slightest by my doing. I really don't think I want to try to change things. Some things either are or they are not. Trying to change them just drives one mad. Oh, yes I am driving myself mad! I am really don't want to try to force anything in my life right now. I just want to adjust and stabilize. Once that is done I will think about what I am to do. Tomorrow I am off to see my therapist for the first time in over three years. I think it is time for some intervention of the professional kind. If continue as I am I will have everyone hating me. I am afraid I already have the people I care about doing that.
I visited my father who has just turned 97 and my aunt who turned 93 two months ago today. These are two people who are so dear to me and I am so aware how old they are. My aunt is recovering from a cold and it is clear that a simple cold is a major deal for her. My father is in great shape and I pray he remains that way a while longer. It has been a long day with a long drive there and back. With such a long drive I had far too much time to think. Remember, I think too much. Really, I do!
I am too tired to write more. Have a great evening.
Love,
Shel
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