I have been up and down in the past two days. Yesterday was a very affirming day. It was a very full day and it was full of very positive experiences. This morning I did two services and I think I preached quite well. I am exhausted now though since I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. I got in late and had to be up very early.
For some reason, I am a bit down now. Nothing new specifically has happened so I am a bit at a loss to understand it. I guess the emotions I have been experiencing kind of caught up to me today. I really don't know. Possibly it is the constant rain this weekend. One thing I do know that many things in life are in shades of gray. They are not black or white, yes or no, true or false. I think I would really like some things to be clear that really are not right now.
The good thing about yesterday is that I am working on making things different. Things will be slow, but I believe I will be a new and better person and possibly happier. I can't say I am happy now, in fact, I feel that a good cry would be appropriate. I am not really unhappy with myself, but with circumstances. I would like for something to work in my favor!
I know it sounds like poor me. I am sorry, but that is how I feel. Tomorrow will be a new and better day.
Love,
Shel
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